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| Happy New Year? We'll see about that. |
2011 was some year. There were ups. There were downs. But I look at my career in the following way: If I am in a different place this year than I was last year, then I am going in the right direction. Of course, I want it all now. I want commercial success and an HBO special, a radio show and a sketch show on Comedy Central.
Now. Please.
But this year I really took significant measures to stay in the moment, and took the time to enjoy myself. I saw lots of shows as an audience member (imagine that!) and I actually took the Summer off - which I have never done in my whole life.
For my own amusement, here is the month-by-month play-by-play:
January 2011
The year started out with such promise. After months of anticipation and fanfare, The Oprah Winfrey Network (appropriately dubbed OWN) debuts. Lost in the DISCOVERY family of channels, I literally stayed home all New Year's Day to watch repeats of "Dr Phil", "In the Bedroom with Dr Laura Berman" and all of the other fake doctors, as well as "The Gayle King Show", "Oprah 25 - Behind The Scenes" and "Oprah's Master Class" - the first couple of what will probably be many Oprah projects. Soon after, the lovable Mama Ragú found herself in the hospital - completely unrelated to the OWN debut. After 18 hours of waiting in a Brooklyn Emergency Room and after lots of tests, it was discovered that Mama Ragú was having low blood pressure attacks, and with a little adjustment to her medication, she would be fine. True to character, she complained and then complained some more: About the food in the hospital; about her neighbor in the room who made lots of noise; and about when she would be released to go home. This was actually a good sign: I really need her around, because without her, I literally have no act. Anyhow, I had an Anniversary Show to plan, so I appeared on "The Will Clark Show" and "Cheroc's Awesome 80s Show" (on Newtown Radio) to plug away and try to generate publicity. I love Cheroc's show, because it takes place in the past, and on this particular day, she was doing a Wham! tribute. I brought all of my old Wham! records and we Jitterbugged-out! The 2-Year Anniversary Show at Stonewall was fun. I hardly cared that the upstairs lounge where I've always had the show was double-booked. I did the show in the downstairs bar during Happy Hour, and it was a blast. John Fugelsang, Jackson Ross Best, Doug Adler, Helene Angley, Lori Sommer and so many others did brief sets; Mama Ragú attended, and we all celebrated the show being the longest-running comedy show at The Stonewall Inn. I would repeat that throughout the year, and in every press release. It annoyed a lot of people. So I said it more. I accomplished that. I wanted you to know it. Subtle. Humble. Modest. Later in the month, I produced & hosted "One Night Only - with Jim Mendrinos & Friends" at The Metropolitan Room, and appeared in The Fresh Fruit Comedy Festival at The Nuyorican Poets Cafe in The East Village. The show with Jim was a full circle-moment for me, because I studied comedy with Jim in 2006. I then had the honor and pleasure of putting together this show five years later. It also featured Leighann Lord, Ellen Karis, Lori Sommer & Josh Homer, and it went off without a hitch. I have to say - that made me feel good.
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| Never too much Judy Gold. |
February 2011
I kicked off February - my least favorite month of the year, co-producing "Tom Ragú Presents: Bear-ly Funny" at The Metropolitan Room with Neil Thornton. Although it was a packed house filled with Gay Bears and the men that love them, it was one of the worst comedic experiences I'd ever had. There was a lesson to be learned, though: If you want something done right, you must do it yourself. Although it was a big pleasure to have Frank Liotti and Jackson Ross Best in the show, I would make a promise to myself to never co-produce a show with anyone else again. And I would try really hard to keep that promise. I prefer to work alone. Later in the month, I performed with The Red Tie Mafia, in their final performance at The Living Theatre. During the month, I rewarded myself (for absolutely no reason) by seeing Mario Cantone at Gotham Comedy Club (who was frenetically fantastic!) and Judy Gold & Nikki Blonsky in Nora Ephron's "Love, Loss & What I Wore" - truly moving and fabulous! It was Oscar time (!) so I saw Judy Gold & Michael Musto give a talk at The Center about the nominees and various movies that I had not seen. And then I headed over to the Upper East Side to The 92Y, to see an interview between Judy Gold and Whoopi Goldberg. Too much Judy? Never. I got to meet Whoopi backstage. Since I was a young teenager, I've admired Whoopi's craft. I saw her one-woman show in the 80s, and I appreciate her honest approach to comedy. I admire how she makes the distinction between "dirty" language and adult language. I love that woman!
With Spring getting ready to be, um, sprung (!) I visited New Jersey and saw my good pal Helene Angley. She runs a fantastic comedy night at Grover's Mill Coffee & Tea, in Princeton Junction. It is the perfect place to try out new material, or if to see if your nightclub material can work on a suburban crowd. The verdict on that is: sometimes. I always open the show there and it is always a fun time for me. Later in the month, I appeared in "Jokes & Gender" - hosted by Alison Grillo and Mike Motz at Broadway Comedy Club. The show had been revamped since the last time I was there. It was more like a talk show than a stand up show. It would go through more revamping. Trust me, I know the feeling. Throughout the month, I saw Pete Dominick and The Sklar Brothers at Gotham Comedy Club. I like them for different reasons. The Sklar Brothers really have that comedy duo thing down. I met them in the downstairs lounge at Gotham, and they were very friendly. I also attended "Homocomicus" at Gotham Comedy Club. Bob Montgomery has been producing this gay showcase at Gotham for 10 years, What an accomplishment! And what a fun show!
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| With my niece Belen, and the lovable Pete Ragú |
With the weather getting warmer in NYC, my lovely niece Belen visited from Madrid, Spain. It had been quite a few years since I'd seen her last, and we did a lot of things around town together. She stayed in Hell's Kitchen - just doors away from Don't Tell Mama. She came to see a show at Stonewall, despite the fact that she barely understood what was going on in the comedy routines. Which, by the way, is fine - people who come to the show all of the time barely know what is going on. During "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" that month, Mama Ragú made her stage debut at Stonewall Inn. Yes, of course she tried to steal my thunder. Yes, she gave me dirty looks and heckled me. And yes, the crowd loved her more than they love me. Later in the month, I was part of "The Fresh Fruit Comedy Festival" at Nuyorican Poets Cafe. This was a Bear edition, hosted by Jed Ryan. Juan Pablo was there with me, as well as a number of fantastic performance artists. I also produced a "Women We Love" show at The Metropolitan Room. This show featured Laura Spaeth, Jane Aquilina, Lori Sommer, Gwen Lockwood - and Bernadette Pauley headlined. She is so hilarious. I love her for many reasons. Not only because she loves dogs. Okay, it's because she loves dogs.
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| The cast of "Women We Love" - Bernadette Pauley, Gwen Lockwood, Lori Sommer, Helene Angley, Laura Spaeth, Valerie Jean Garduno, myself - and Jane Aquilina. |
May 2011
This is the month that I had been dreading all year. No, not because it was my birthday. That's actually a thing I don't care about, because the clock has stopped on that at age 33. I 'd been dreading May because this was the month that Oprah was to sign off of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" after 25 years. There was a little part of me that thought that - at the eleventh hour, she would reconsider and sign on for another five years. She'd done it before. Like when she was originally going to stop at 20 years, but reconsidered. To say I was experiencing anxiety and stress would be the understatement of the year. (Did I mention that I have no life, and I live vicariously through others?) Anyhow, I grew up with Oprah. Well, not really. She's from Mississippi, and I am from NYC. But I remember as a young kid, running home from school to catch "The Phil Donahue Show" and then "The Oprah Winfrey Show" and then doing my homework ... She really affected my life, and to think that it was all coming to an end was all too much. As you'd suspect, there was a two-day special leading up to the finale. The last show was simply Oprah, in all of her Oprah glory doing a review of all of the lessons she hoped we'd learned from her/her show over the years. We all cried at the end, and then she walked off. I still have not deleted it from my TiVO. Millions of people speculated whether this was the end of Oprah. I think not. This seemed more like a beginning. Later in the month, I appeared in "That Time of the Month" at EastVille Comedy Club. Hosted by Gerard Mignone, the show has my second-favorite name for a comedy show! The all-time favorite name is Jena Friedman's "Entertaining the Bartender" ... I co-produced "Tom Ragú Presents: Bawdy & Soul - with Jane Aquilina" at The Metropolitan Room. Although I promised myself earlier in the year that I would not co-produce with other people, I really tried to do it differently this time, by splitting up the production roles. Jane is amazingly talented. She put together a band that was fantastic. They were a talented bunch and were really behind her. The audience had a good time. And I learned that I still prefer to work alone. Every year, I throw a comedy show for myself called "Tom Ragú is 33 ... again?!?" with all of my favorite people. In the past, proceeds from the show have gone to favorite charities like GMHC or Gods Love We Deliver. This year, the show was at The Stonewall Inn, and Mama Ragú and I (probably the only person I can work with!) had catering, refreshments and birthday cake brought in. Chicken Wings, Mama Ragú and Birthday Cake - what a combination!
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| onstage with Mama Ragú at The Stonewall Inn. |
June 2011
This month, I performed in quite a number of shows, in addition to my regularly scheduled show at The Stonewall Inn. I performed at Comedy Village in the West Village with PJ Landers and "QTALK" at Metropolitan Room. I also had my annual Gay Pride Comedy & Variety show - "Clutch The Pearls" - at The Metropolitan Room. That show is always a good time, and I enjoy working with all of my fellow LGBTQ comics. I also appeared on Valerie Smaldone's radio show "Valerie's New York" to talk Gay Pride in NYC (apparently I am a gay expert) and Mama Ragú & I went to Hell's Kitchen at 11pm, where I appeared in "Top of the Hourglass" - hosted by the lovely Pixie Esmonde. What a fun show! However, after the show, Mama Ragú wanted to still "party on" and go get some pizza. Although it was 2am, if you know Mama Ragú, you know that she can be pretty persuasive. We found a great pizza place ... $6.00 for a slice of pizza! After paying what I knew was Times Square Robbery at 2-in-the-morning, I thought "this pizza must be the most amazing pizza, if they are charging 6-dollars for it." Needless to say: No. It was not amazing. It was amazing how horrible it was! I took in a few shows during the month: I saw comedy legend Joan Rivers at The Laurie Beechman Theatre and a childhood favorite Elayne Boosler at Gotham Comedy Club! Elayne Boosler is apparently back, and in a big way. She took some time off to start a fantastic non-profit charity Tails of Joy - helping homeless dogs. Speaking of dogs, my little friend Pete Ragú celebrated his 4th birthday on June 11th. It was hard to believe - because it felt like just last month when I adopted him at 8-months old.
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| Pete Ragú, circa 2007, right after his adoption into this crazy family and the launch of his Facebook Page. |
With the Summer in full swing and "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" on break until September, I decided to take it easy for once and take some time to enjoy myself. I have been accused of not slowing down enough to enjoy the fruits of my labor. So this Summer, no more shows other than the ones I had committed to - and I had made plans to begin the work on my one-person show, tentatively called "My Life .. And Other Awkward Moments". I performed again in "That Time of the Month" at EastVille Comedy Club, where host & producer Gerard Mignone talked about leaving for San Diego Gay Pride the next day. I remember San Diego Pride, and how lovely and quaint it seemed, compared to NYC Gay Pride Madness. I made it out to New Jersey twice: first to Grover's Mill Coffee & Tea in Princeton Junction with Helene Angley, then again to a special comedy night Helene was producing at a place called RATS at the Grounds for Sculpture museum in Hamilton, NJ. The show was fantastic, the crowd was awesome, and the hilarious Robin Fox headlined the show. It was so good to see her after a long while. I tried to keep the fact that I was performing in a restaurant called RATS to myself. But I really wanted to make a joke about it. I ended the month by taking Mama Ragú to a matinee performance of "The Judy Show - My Life as a Sitcom", starring Judy Gold at DR2 Theatre in Union Square. What a fabulously nostalgic and moving look at one's life, through the lens of the various sitcoms we all grew up with.
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| Mama Ragú at The Judy Show. |
August 2011
True to my word, I did absolutely nothing in August. No shows. No appearances. For the first time ever. I was so proud that I kept that promise to myself. I did go to the gym. Once. And I joined that senseless, vapid, insipid world that is Twitter. What a fucking waste of time. Later in the month, I traveled out to Long Island to see The Debbie Gibson & Tiffany 80s Show at Westbury Music Fair. I had a great time. All that was missing was Toni Basil, Milli Vanilli and Spandau Ballet. Such fun. I did have one question: How did Tiffany become the talented one in that equation? I also went to see "The Judy Show" at The DR2 Theatre (again) with my friend and writer Jed Ryan, who wrote a very flattering piece about me and "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" in his column on Dish Miss.
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| Mel & El onstage at The Stonewall Inn. |
September 2011
After nine-weeks off (!) for The Summer, it was time to get back into the groove of things and become a comedian again. I really enjoyed my time off. I had never taken such a vacation like that before and stuck to it. I'd always say "Oh, just one more show" and then before you knew it, I'd be working in the sweltering heat of July in NYC again. Anyhow, to promote what I was calling "The Season 3 Premiere" of "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue", I appeared in a few shows to get back into the swing of being onstage again, including: "Top of the Hourglass" - hosted by my favorite Broadway Babe Pixie Esmonde; "MetroJam" at The Metropolitan Room with Jenna Esposito; "Jokes & Gender" by Alison Grillo, which made another conversion and was on a rooftop for the Summer at The Colonial House Inn in Chelsea; and my good friends at "QTALK" at The Metropolitan Room. I did a bit of a media blitz, also, appearing on the many radio shows, including: "Into The Weekend with Walt & Kari Ann"; an interview on Anddy Radio which was a lot of fun; "This Show is So Gay" on QNATION; "The Edge" on QNATION - also tremendous fun; and "The Paul & Matty Show" on QNATION. With ads in all of the papers and all of the interviews I'd done, it was a lot of work leading up to the show. And the end result was a packed house! "The Season 3 Premiere" of "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" featured all-comedy-duos. The show featured Kelly & Lindsey, and the fantastic Mel & El headlined. Dumb & Dumber™ (not their actual names) also appeared, performing a simulated masturbation sketch with 81-year old Mama Ragú in the front row. Classy. Later in the month, I did a benefit "Women We Love" show at The Metropolitan Room, with all of the net proceeds going to a worthwhile organization. I was very pleased with the idea of giving back what was so freely given to me - and knowing full well that you cannot keep what you have unless you give it away, I decided to start a new show that traveled from place to place. Every show would have ifferent comics and variety acts, and the proceeds from each show would go to a different charity. If I only had a clever name .... In addition to the busy month, Mama Ragú, Juan Pablo & I went to a taping of "Anderson" - the new Anderson Cooper syndicated talk show taping in Columbus Circle. I love Anderson Cooper so much. I think that his work at CNN is stellar, and of all of the 24-hour cable programs, he tries the best to remain neutral and not let his personal politics filter through the discussion. Having said that, on the day of the daytime talk-show taping, the guests was the cast of "Sister Wives" ... Really!?! I was so disappointed. My disappointment turned into a mild rage when we in the audience were "forced" to stand and applaud when they came out from backstage. In case you are not familiar, "Sister Wives" is a Reality Show about Kody Brown and his three wives and seventeen children, as they flee from state to state - evading polygamy laws as they go. What enraged me was the fact that - although gay men & women can get married in NY State, there were still 43 other states (at the time - since then Prop 8 in California was overturned) where marriage equality is is not recognized. In other words, this Mormon Clown Named Kody Brown can marry three people, sire a litter of children, have a Reality TV show and achieve semi-celebrity status - but loving gay people across the country cannot even marry one person and profess their love for each other to the world? I could not understand what was the attraction to this family, and why this family was getting so much press. It made me want to become an activist all over again.
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| Oprah Winfrey & Rosie O'Donnell at the unveiling of "The Rosie Show" sign on the Harpo Studios lot in Chicago, September 2011. |
October 2011
It was the month I had been waiting for all Summer. Since "The Oprah Winfrey Show" went off of the air in May, I personally had been keeping track of the days until the premiere of the new Rosie O'Donnell project on OWN - "The Rosie Show". After several months of (very) lackluster programming, including: "The Gayle King Show", "Enough Already with Peter Walsh", various Reality TV projects by The Judds, Ryan & Tatum O'Neal, Shania Twain, Sarah Ferguson - plus repeats of "Dr Phil", "Flip This House" and the unwatchable "In The Bedroom with Dr Laura Berman" - who also sells her own line of sex toys, needless to say, I was ready for some fun! I was ready for some comedy! And I was ready for some more Oprah! Because premiering directly afterwards was "Oprah's Life Class" (formerly working title was "OWN: The Oprah Class"), a five-week interactive show with our teacher, Oprah - featuring clips from some of the 4,561 episodes as "lessons". One day you'd have Lady Gaga or Paula Deen; then on another day, you'd have a lesson about Visualization, Forgiveness or Joy Rising - coupled with Oprah's thoughts about The Great Car Giveaway. Good move, Oprah. A new show about your top-rated other show. Genius. My favorite lesson: Oprah Winfrey talking at length about the pitfalls and dangers of Ego. Did anyone else see the irony of Oprah Winfrey - "The Big O" - pontificating about the dangers of Ego? Ironic or not, I watched every single episode of both "The Rosie Show" and "Oprah's Life Class", because I have no life and I live vicariously through other, more-successful people. When not burning up my TiVO, I was naturally producing shows. In October, I had three shows going on in the space of one week - always a mistake.
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| Backstage at "Tickled Pink" with Jed Ryan & Lester Greene. |
In addition to the regularly-scheduled "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue", I also was working on the next edition of "Sorry, We're Funny", at Laugh Lounge NYC, and "Tom Ragú Presents: Tickled Pink!" - co-produced with Jed Ryan for Fresh Fruit Comedy Festival. I was looking forward to that show very much. It was a variety show - rather than the standard comedy shows I do. The show featured recording artist Lester Greene (NYC's biggest flirt!), Ben Lerman, rapper Bone Intell, Sunshine McLean, Jay Edwards, Juan Pablo, Chanelle Futrell, and others. Jed & I co-hosted. To promote the show, I made a radio appearance on "Da Doo Dirty Radio Show" - with DJ Baker & his gang. I had such fun on the show, although DJ Baker tried his best to corner me and embarrass me on live radio. Nice try.
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| "The Drama of it all" |
November 2011
With the Holidays just weeks away, I always brace myself for Drama ... and yes, Drama is spelled with a Capital "D" in The Ragú House. But who would have thought that the most Drama of the year would come from producing a happy little comedy show, and trying to do the right thing? My original aim for producing these "Sorry, We're Funny" shows was to give back what was so freely given to me; that I do not get to keep what I have (spiritually) without giving it away. Rather than get into the whole thing - which would literally make me eat a loaf of bread, let's just say that I'd prefer to raise money for a non-profit organization & just hand it all over to them, rather than to have to deal with a Board of Directors and an attorney representing them. I had such negative experiences with the first two "Sorry, We're Funny" shows and the various idiots (in my opinion; see US Constitution) on The Board of Directors of the charity - not to mention their equally asinine, idiotic and preposterous excuse for a lawyer (again, my opinion) that it almost caused me to forget why it was I started doing those "Sorry, We're Funny" shows in the first place. The show in November took place in fashionable and fabulous East Brunswick, New Jersey at Center Stages Studios. But the interaction with the charity's Board and the idiot lawyer (once again, my opinion) was truly ridiculous - and since I like animals better than people anyway - I switched the November show's beneficiary to a local animal shelter. Never one to become negative, if you have the opportunity to give to Natasha's Justice Project - don't! If you want to help end domestic violence or violence against women, give to Mariska Hargitay's Joyful Heart Foundation. They are a much better-managed Foundation, I am sure. Happy Thanksgiving! I made a fabulous meal and had my best friend over. It was just us, Mama Ragú and Pete Ragú. I prepared turkey three ways - Turkey cutlets, Turkey meatballs and Turkey drumsticks, with mashed potatoes, rice, corn, cranberry sauce and pie. One would have though that The Gay Mens Chorus was coming over, with all of the food I'd prepared. I think I just finished leftovers yesterday!
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| Hosting "Sorry, We're Funny" at Queens Pride House in Jackson Heights. |
With Christmas right around the corner and Mama Ragu's Birthday at the beginning of the month, December is always super-hectic time of the year! But things got put into perspective very quickly when I saw people on the news getting pepper-sprayed while Christmas shopping at The Mall. That was all I needed to see. I went online & completed all of the Christmas shopping by December 5. I was not stepping foot into a mall or retail store of any kind. Merry Christmas to all - and give me that flat-screen TV or you get it right in the eyes! The Mama Ragú Birthday Party was a smash. We went to a fabulous little place on Staten Island with family & friends. There was comedy, singing and great food. What a way to ring in her 80th. year. Such fun! However, I had to plan the big "Final Episode" of "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" and prepare for the December "Tom Ragú Presents: Sorry, We're Funny" at Queens Pride House in lovely Jackson Heights. The people there were a dream to deal with. We planned a fantastic show, and it all went off without a hitch. It was the most-fantastic and easiest time I have had (so far) with these "Sorry, We're Funny" shows. Plus the organization - which provides outreach and services to the LGBTQ Community in Queens, raised thousands of dollars. That made me happy. What makes me unhappy is the reality that "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" will be coming to an end, after 5 years of shows - three of them at Stonewall Inn. So after all of the anxiety, sweat and planning each week; after all of the new friends made and lost; after all of the amazing sets and tremendous bombs; after all of the triumphs and public humiliation - many times in front of my mother; and most importantly, after growing so much as a comedian and producer - it all comes down to this: The end of the show. January 9, 2012. The day will come. The day will go. And I have to plan it.
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Whew! That was some year! Sometimes, just when you think you really didn't do much, it becomes an interesting exercise to look at all in one place. I learned a lot this year, and for that I am always grateful. I made some new friends this year. I re-connected with some old friends, as well. An old friend from High School came to a show and surprised my socks off! I made some enemies this year, as well. I am grateful for that, too. I am happy when people show me who they really are. These days, I choose to believe them.
Shameless Plug:
Coming up on January 13th, I will be hosting the next installment of my traveling show "Tom Ragú Presents: Sorry, We're Funny" ... This time around, we are at the elegant Metropolitan Room, and all net proceeds go to Loli's Place Animal Shelter.
Tickets are only 10-bucks.
Reservations: 212-206-0440
C'mon, don't you want to save a dog's life? They are so much cooler than people!
Here are some more pictures from the year that was 2011:
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| Danny Leary and Irene Bremis at "Clutch The Pearls" at The Metropolitan Room |
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| Pete Ragú, enjoying a beautiful Summer day in the park. |
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| Onstage with Helene Angley at The Metropolitan Room, NYC. |
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| With Will Clark at "The Will Clark Show" |
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| With Jed Ryan, backstage at "Tickled Pink!" |
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| The cast of The Two-Year Anniversary Show of "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue": Jane Aquilina, Cheroc, Mama Ragú, Lori Sommer, Helene Angley, Tom Ragú, Doug Adler & Jackson Ross Best Jr. |
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| Celebrating Mama Ragu's big 80th Birthday - Staten Island, NY. |
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| Mama Ragú finally let her afro- puff grow out. |
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| Lori Sommer at "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" at Stonewall Inn, NYC. |
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| Lori Sommer outside of Stonewall Inn. |
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| "Tom & The Tomettes" at The Stonewall Inn: Mama Ragú, Tom Ragú, Lori Sommer & Jane Aquilina. |
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| With Juan Pablo at "The Tom Ragú Comedy Revue" |
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| Pete Ragú - King of The Mountain. Winter 2011. |
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